I mailed in my final credit card payment today. That means, for the first time since I was 20, I don’t owe any money to Capital One, Citibank, Providian, or even Discover. Now I don’t know what to do with myself.
My whole adult life has been spent either going into or getting out of debt. I’m not talking about shopping sprees and gadgets. That stuff is for amateurs. I go into debt big. I start businesses and come out the other end with tens of thousands of dollars in debt. I’m the guy who hears someone talk about how they’ve got to pay their $800 credit card bill and wonders what the hell they’re complaining about.
The last two times I scrapped my way out of debt, I went right back into business on my next idea. But this time, I’m a little hesitant. For one, I don’t have a good idea. For two, I don’t know that I want to risk it again. Maybe this means I’m finally a grown-up. Maybe it just means I’m chicken. Who knows?
I’ve taken a lot of risks in my life. I’ve done the things that people do to get rich. I’ve started businesses. I’ve worked at start-ups. Mine just haven’t worked out quite as well as the Silicon Valley types. Essentially, I’m the rule that proves just how special the entrepreneurial stories are of people like Bill Gates and Russell Simmons and proves just how rare the stock option lottery win of people like Google’s office manager are.
Some things work out better than others. Which one will work is anyone’s guess. This much is certain. Debt-free is uncharted waters for me. Hell, I don’t even have a car payment at the moment. What’s going on? Freedom is a scary thing.
