Chrisco Spins

We all know Hillary Clinton is leaking superdelegates like a beached oil tanker. But now her street cred is taking a hit too. That’s because 50 Cent is backing away from his support for the New York senator.

Two questions leap to mind here. 1) Fiddy was supporting Hillary? Yep, sure was as he told Time last year. 2) Fiddy listens to political speeches? Sure does.

How much do I love the visual of 50 Cent sitting in his Connecticut mansion watching the Democratic candidates debating the details of their economic policies? I love it a lot.

Hillary, oh Hillary. We always thought you were too smart for this. But now the pursuit of power has blinded you. At this point in the game Hill, whether you lose the Democratic nomination (most likely) or win it by convincing the superdelegates to override the results of months of state ballots and caucuses (more unlikely by the moment), in the end you lose. Mitt Romney may have been a pretty boy dilletante, but even he grasped that by conceding early he lived to fight another election. You Hillary are about to become a Democratic persona non grata. (more…)

I’m kind of laughing at the huge flap about Rev. Jeremiah Wright saying “God Damn America.” Why is that so shocking? Why is it so shocking that the pastor of a church in Chicago, where the entire south side is synonymous with minority poverty, would not have glowing things to say about our country?

We’ve heard a million commentators say the same thing in less direct terms over the years. Right after 9/11 plenty of people said it, including Rev. Wright in his “Chickens Come Home to Roost” sermon. Many of the United States problems in the Middle East are a direct result of our foreign policy. I am in full agreement with that statement. I wouldn’t necessarily say “God Damn America.” But I don’t find it shocking that someone else might.

Rev. Wright says a whole bunch of what I would consider far more controversial things in the same sermon that got completely glossed over (more…)

Let’s talk about the most outdated phrase contained in the U.S. Constitution. Let’s talk about the Second Amendment. The U.S. Supreme Court today took up a case challenging the District of Columbia’s handgun ban. Let me tell you why both the ban’s defenders and opponents are missing the point. (more…)

This weekend, the Federal Reserve backed a bailout of Bear Stearns to the tune of $30 billion dollars. The deal would allow JP Morgan Chase to acquire Bear for $2 per share. It’s the corporate equivalent of getting a new Porsche for a nickel because some guy cheated on his wife and she seeks revenge through auto sales. It’s nice that Bear won’t go under and take the economy with it, but I’m getting really sick of government bailouts. (more…)

If you’ve turned on a television, radio, or computer today then you probably know New York Governor Eliot Spitzer got caught in a prostitution sting. I’d like to tell you why I don’t care about that.

Eliot Spitzer did a lot of good for a lot of people as New York Attorney General. He took on all kinds of big corporate nasties and we’re all better off for his efforts. Despite that record, he’s proven an utter failure as governor of New York. I don’t care and I’m not offended that he occasionally sleeps with very well-paid prostitutes. I absolutely care and am offended by his incredible ineptness during his first year in office. Simply put, he’s been an awful governor.

Puzzle me this… why is prostitution illegal, but porn can be picked up at any corner gas station? Both involve people paying for sex. If Gov. Spitzer had filmed himself sleeping with the prostitute and distributed the tape under the Vivid or Girls Gone Wild brand, he would have been in the legal clear and made another million dollars. As it stands, he’s expected to resign in disgrace.

Moral of the story: Governor, you’re rich and famous, next time call up Kim Kardashian. I hear she’s always available.

I don’t care what anybody says… George W. Bush is getting more fun by the day. Now that no one is paying any attention to what he does or says, he’s letting his inner frat boy run the whole shop. And I love him for it.

Our president is still a royal idiot, but at least now he’s entertaining. Did you see him endorsing McCain today? If you didn’t you missed a great bit of political comedy. He actually forgot he wasn’t in the frat house for a minute. In the middle of the reporter Q&A, Bush stopped everything and yelled for Wolf Blitzer:

“Wolf, where’s Wolf? No, I’m not calling you. Wolf! No, not you either. Where’s Wolf?”

“Right here,” Wolf answered finally.

To which Bush replied, “Well, ask something, will you?” It was high comedy.

Like I said, Bush is still the town dunce. He’s got a good share of months left to wreck the country and the world. But at least he’s entertaining me now. His lame duck year is going to be nuts.

Let me be the first to wish Hillary Clinton a happy exit from the Democratic primary fight. I know she hasn’t dropped out yet. But the Texas polls have widened and the Ohio polls have narrowed, both in Barack Obama’s favor. So Hillary… in the immortal words of Russell Simmons… “thanks for coming out, God bless, good night.” (more…)

In the movie “Tombstone”, Val Kilmer playing Doc Holliday says to his lover who has just given him a cigarette despite his tuberculosis something to the effect of, “I love you. Then again, you may be the Anti-Christ.” This sums up my feelings for political analyst Amy Holmes perfectly. (more…)

I make no effort to hide the fact that my politics lean pretty heavily liberal. If you need any proof of that, take a look at my opinion on the ethics of torture. So tonight’s MSNBC debate should be required viewing for me. But I’m not watching. It’s just too much. Familiarity has bred contempt as the saying goes. (more…)